Here's the conclusion I draw out of the past few weeks: what you think of as a guarantee to semi-permanent happiness, something you never imagined you'd be lucky enough to experience, the thing you've always thought of in terms of "If only I could reach that far, man, I'd ask for nothing more" most likely won't live up to such a big promise. At the same time, something you embark on with absurdly low expectations and which you look at as a one-way alley to just a few inches underneath rock bottom can actually work out surprisingly well.
I like when life outsmarts me like that. When the plans I so arrogantly assumed I could make take a sharp turn and I have adjust all my car mirrors. When I catch myself smiling over something that caught me completely off guard. Being guarded is overrated - it tends to pay off to open yourself up to be touched, whether it's by the most gentle finger tips or a king-sized sledge hammer.